Chapter 3242

The life that had been buried in Shadow’s memories — his first life — was unearthed and brought to the surface by the Oracle. And through her power, he experienced it far more vividly than merely remembering those distant days would have felt.

It was nothing like recalling the events of a faraway past. Instead, those memories descended upon him like an avalanche, as vivid and intense as living them for the first time had been. As if Shadow was there once again, struggling to survive another day — as if he was breathing the toxic air of the outskirts, trembling from the cold of the bitter winter, and wondering what he would eat tomorrow.

But, at the same time, a smaller part of him retained all his future knowledge and experience. From the height of his current deific self, Shadow was able to perceive and understand the tumultuous events of his very first life from a different perspective.

‘Sunless… Sunny.’

That was his name. Had been his name? Shadow was not sure…

Not sure just yet.

He simply remembered.

His life began in the outskirts of NQSC. The father whom he barely remembered was like a shadow in his memories — after all, by the time Sunny could really remember anything, the poor man was already gone. His father was gone, but the absence he had left behind was vast and ever-present, impossible to miss.

Of course, Sunny did not understand that at the time. His mother was too young, no more than a child herself — but to him, she was the entire world. To Sunny, she was like a goddess, omnipotent and all-knowing, warm like the sun and undoubtedly eternal. His childhood was full of hardship, but he did not know it. He was quite happy in his little world, protected by his mother’s embrace and the great, enduring shield of ignorance.

But then, his goddess grew feeble and weak in front of his eyes… and before he knew it, she was gone as well.

Perhaps that was why the idea that the gods could die had never felt strange to him. Instead, it had only seemed like the natural order of things.

It still did.

The little boy did not understand a lot of things. Most of all, he did not understand himself. But from the distant future, Shadow could already see… he could see that the Strings of Fate were already wrapped around him — had been entangling him from the moment he was born, all those years ago, the shadow of the moon covering the sun and plunging the world into dim darkness.

But Sunny remained ignorant. He was a soft and sensitive child. All he wanted was to protect his sister — because he loved her, and because his mother had loved her as well. However, they were separated instead, and he ended up on the streets.

The outskirts were a cruel place, and it was especially cruel to children. Nevertheless, he survived — partially because he had a keen mind, and partially because he fixated on the idea of rescuing his sister from imagined dangers. That misguided goal helped him stay alive, and it also saved him from walking down the wrong path and falling into any one of the countless traps that lay waiting for street kids like him.

His harsh upbringing was not pleasant, and he experienced many things that no child should ever experience. But the overwhelming desire to find his sister guided him like a beacon, pushing him to endure those lightless times.

When he found Rain, though, he realized that she did not need his help. She did not need him to save her. The goal that had kept him alive shattered, leaving his heart in ruin.

That was when the seed of Corruption was planted into his soul, and when the Nightmare Spell chose him to be its carrier. Entering the first Nightmare, Sunny did not care whether he lived or died. But strangely enough — or perhaps entirely to be expected from someone who was Fated — it was precisely that lack of care that allowed him to survive. He remained cold and detached instead of being consumed by terror, making calculated decisions and overcoming one obstacle after another.

The fellow slaves, the Mountain King, and even Auro of the Nine — in the end, all of them died, while Sunny remained alive.

He even received the blessing of Shadow God and a True Name.

Lost of Light… a brand that would shape the rest of his life, or perhaps had been shaped by his life — past and future — instead. Emerging from the harrowing Nightmare, Sunny experienced impossible luck — he met just the right person at just the right time. He met Soul Reaper Jet, a fellow outskirt survivor, who gave him a priceless piece of advice.

‘No one can survive in the Dream Realm alone.’

Luckily, Sunny took her advice to heart. That was what allowed him, who was distrustful of others and terrified of getting close to people because of his new Flaw, to build meaningful connections with other Sleepers on the Forgotten Shore.

Nephis, Cassie, Effie, Kai — these people would become his companions in the terrifying days to come, helping him grow and leave his old shell behind.

Of course, for every two steps forward he took, he took one step back.

Humans were like this: they were irrational, messy creatures. No human had ever grown without stumbling a few times along the way. Of course, every path Sunny took was always full of sharp thorns, so every misstep he made carried a painful price.

But still, throughout it all, he continued to grow and improve.

He survived the Forgotten Shore, and despite the crushing shock of his last moments there, he carried the experiences he had earned into the future.

He found his sister once again. He explored the Chained Isles. He deepened his friendships and honed his skills. He overcame his resentment of Cassie and gathered a cohort to conquer the Second Nightmare — there, he met Noctis, received help from him, and helped Noctis in turn by letting go of his hatred and killing Solvane for the second time.

He became a Master.

And then, Nephis — the woman he loved, but wasn’t quite ready to admit that he did — returned from what should have become her grave. Sunny was impossibly happy to be reunited with her, but also terrified of the power she wielded over him. So, he took another step back and fled to Antarctica. Ironically enough, Antarctica became the place where he grew up the most.

Thrust into the Chain of Nightmares and a position of leadership, responsible not only for himself but also for countless other lives, Sunny rose to the occasion and dragged a convoy of refugees across the abomination-infested continent to the tall walls of Falcon Scott.

Shadow lived those cold days while forgetting to breathe, already knowing what was coming next.

Watching Falcon Scott fall made him a person. Sunny had gone to Antarctica in search of conviction, but what he found instead was the courage to accept himself as he was, to solidify his personal beliefs as principles that were not inferior to anyone else’s.

Out there in the frigid ruins of a city he had failed to protect, Sunny found the confidence to face the rest of humanity — even the Sovereigns — on equal footing.

He had thought that Nephis only saw him as a follower… but in truth, it was Sunny himself who had never believed himself to be her equal.

Until the end of that terrifying night.

After Antarctica, Sunny was finally ready to walk forward… but, of course, a time arrived for him to take another step back. So, he abandoned his companions in the Tomb of Ariel and ventured into the Estuary. This time, the price he had to pay for losing his way was the most dire yet.

Having lost everything, forgotten by everyone, he fled the pain of being left with nothing and spent years aimlessly wandering the Dream Realm. It was only when he found the broken fragments of his world there that Sunny finally felt ready to face the world again.

He decided that even if he had nothing, he could still try to change everything.

And so, he returned.

The rest was a whirlwind.

The Domain War, his budding relationship with Nephis, his desires and aspirations — all of it reached a culmination during his battle against the King of Swords, where he chose to kill himself, and therefore defied the laws of existence. He rose to the throne of Supremacy.

That was how a kid from the outskirts found himself becoming one of the two rulers of the world — and not just any world, at that, but one that was dying. He tried to protect it side by side with Nephis, and did a good enough job of it… until the Dreamspawn descended from the Moon to lay claim to the minds of humanity.

So, Sunny took one final step forward — the most difficult one yet. He ventured into the Tomb of Ariel, battled the Vile Thieving Bird, and took his fate back from its claws.

After that, his development as a human was complete. He had achieved everything he needed to achieve, gaining true freedom — the only freedom that existed in the world — by making a choice to sacrifice it. To bond himself to the person he trusted the most in the world without looking back.

It was just that, at that point… being human was not enough anymore. The world was still dying — it was on the verge of being completely destroyed — and there was only one way to protect it.

Sunny had to cease being a human…

And become a god.

And so, he — as well as Nephis, Cassie, and Mordret — challenged the Fifth Nightmare. It was just that Sunny severely underestimated the difficulty of the Unmaking.

He had judged correctly that weakening his Domain before entering the Seed would make it easier for him to maintain his sense of self during the trial — or at least a semblance of it — and prevent him from becoming like the rulers of Mictlan, who had become deities only to bring ruin to their people.

However, Sunny did not account for the fact that, although his second Domain — the Fate Domain — was nascent and underdeveloped, it would influence the scale of his Unmaking as well.

And so, he was crushed by it.

He lost himself almost entirely.

He endured so much, suffered such terrifying torment, and remained in the Unmaking for so long that he completely forgot who he was, completely lost the desire to remember who he was.

Becoming a vast being who simply called itself the Shadow.

Shadow hid in the cave. Shadow met Tatal. Shadow journeyed across the mortal realms with Smile of Heaven and Noctis.

Shadow came to the Jade Palace and met the Oracle of Thetis… Cassie.

…Shadow shuddered and staggered back, released from the trance of Cassie’s Transcendent Ability.

‘I… I…’

Shadow… Sunny?… looked at her with wide eyes.

‘Who the hell am I?”

For a moment, he was completely disoriented. But not because he was lost in the world around him — rather, because he was lost in his own understanding of himself.

And then, a sudden thought surfaced in his mind.

Sunny stared at Cassie in stunned silence for a moment, then laughed suddenly.

“You… you and your tricks! Damnation!”

What was it that Cassie had said?

She had promised him that if he allowed her to help him remember, he would find what he was looking for.

The secret of how he could die.

Of course, that was technically true — after all, now that Sunny was aware that the Unmaking was long over and he had been in the Nightmare proper for thousands of years, he knew that he could die at any moment. In fact, it was a miracle that he was still alive!

So, Cassie had not lied.

What she had conveniently forgotten to mention, though, was that if Sunny were to remember who he was, he would rather fight all six great gods at the same time than die willingly.

So, the damn choice had been meaningless all along.

Studying Sunny cautiously, Cassie lingered for a few moments, and then asked:

“How… how do you feel?”

Sunny — Shadow — gave her a tense look. He opened his mouth, then closed it again. Then, he groaned and rubbed his face.

“I don’t know. Like someone who is not quite sure who he is.”

Everything felt so strange.

After experiencing the eternity of the Unmaking, Sunny had lost himself. But now, thanks to Cassie, he had experienced his original life anew — more vividly than any life forced upon him by the Nightmare was in his memories.

Of course, it was far more vivid and vibrant, leaving the strongest impression. After all, it was his first life — and everything felt more intense and unforgettable when experienced for the first time. He had perceived everything that followed through the prism of his original self, and all of it paled in comparison to the intensity of his original life.

But he wasn’t really Sunny anymore… or, at least, he was far more than a man called Sunny had been once. How could he not be now that his age could only be counted in thousands of years, and his mind contained the memories of countless lives, countless deaths… a whole eternity worth of experiences he had endured?

His original self was… like a vessel. And contained within that vessel was a deep and dark ocean of countless lifetimes.

Both the vessel and the ocean were a part of him.

That vast expanse of memories, though — of experiences, of influences — was far more than a human mind could contain.

So, Sunny could not call himself a human anymore.

He paused for a moment, and then added in a low tone:

“But, at least, now I know who I was. And who I am meant to be.”